Rejoice with me, dear friends!

I am almost 100% positive that I did pass my biochem exam that I wrote this morning. It was not easy, and my brain was rebelling at what I crammed into it over the last 2 days, but I did remember several things. Probably enough to pass, though not with an A. Or probably even a B. But since this course is all year, I have another midterm and final to add to this one.

It's been tough to fit the study time in, what with working, and 5 other tough classes, and other labs and exams and papers, and the boyfriend, and co-leading my Core group... and you know, there's facebook... (actually I'm not that bad of a facebook junkie; but blog-reading... there is my problem. Also downloading music. My library expands every time I have to study)...

So wish me luck and send me prayers. My next exam is tomorrow morning at 8:30, so I have less than 24 hours to cram for my other hardest class. I have a lot to learn... and this one I can't fail because it actually IS the end of the class... and this exam is worth 40%. Yikes.

Fall on campus is beautiful

Fall here is absolutely gorgeous. Of course it doesn't look this nice anymore... a lot more drab and dreary. But this is one of the times I managed to have my camera with me on a sunny day a couple weeks ago. It's a little over-exposed, but you get the idea. Colours are amazing.

(None)

So, I've been told my whole life by certain people that I'm an angry person... and I'll admit, I've got some anger issues. Most people wouldn't tell you that right off the bat, because I don't come across as some ball of fury or whatever and generally seem pretty happy and cheerful.

I've always warned R, however, that I tended towards anger as a form of defense... and he always disagreed with me. Told me people that told me I was angry were just projecting their perceptions onto me... It was kind of nice to hear that.

But the other day he mentioned that he noticed that my anger just kinda goes in cycles... at one thing, then another, then a third thing... then back to the first thing.

Stupid psychology... what happened to the good old days when not everyone had issues? It feels like such a self-centred world right now... everyone needs to discover themselves, and undergo therapy, and "deal with underlying issues" of resentment or whatnot... I guess I was hoping I wouldn't be one of those people. Not that I'm judging anyone.

So it makes me sad... He's very accepting and supportive and whatever, but I'm just sad that he has to deal with that broken part of me when I was hoping that some of those issues were resolved.

I'm starting my new job!!

So I have to get to Surrey so many times it's not even funny. He wanted me to come in on three consecutive weekdays for training... and I'm like, uhh, pardon? Did he forget that I have classes every day and that I live at UBC?

So I'm going in Saturday/Sunday/Tuesday combos for the next three weekends. I'm going to die. First of all, the hours: 6am-1pm Sat/Sun, 3-10pm Tuesday nights. So I'm going to have to get someone to drive me to city hall at 6 a.m. on weekends, and somehow get back to Vancouver after 10pm on a Tuesday. I'm considering insuring my car... if I'm making more $ I could maybe afford it, but what I really need to be buying is a laptop. Or just food and stuff.

So I'm going to be exhausted. I've got a midterm this Friday and a massive lab report (from a 3-week lab) due on Monday... meaning I won't be getting much of the lab done before the midterm, so it'll all be on the weekend. Also sucky is that I have to be home for the entire weekend. There's no way I can get work done at home. Not only am I on my sister's comp (which doesn't have EXCEL! OH NO!) but it's in the living room. And there is no way that my family can stay away from me ... I'm a delectable target for conversation simply because I'm home. I've GOT to figure out how to find a computer that I can work on.

And then working Tuesday, I'm going to miss the review class for my midterm NEXT week, on the Thursday... so feeling screwed. And since I'm feeling screwed, I'm blogging.


At least I'll be making some decent money for once in my life. Around $24/hour? Really excited for that to show up in my account.

It's been a crazy week

7 days:

• R's surprise birthday hockey game / appy's and drinks at Darby's
• Early-morning wait at the US border
• Day of shopping
• Family birthday dessert
• Up early for first service at church
• Thanksgiving lunch at my house
• Thanksgiving dinner at R's house
• Grocery shopping Monday morning
• Drive back home
• Study
• Three midterms
• Jimmy Eat World concert at the Commodore
  
• Lunch with Katie
  
• 2.5 year "dating-iversary"

And the highlight!! I got a new duvet cover!! For some strange reason I love all new bedding. This is my newest enjoyment (from Jysk, on sale for a student's price):

Doesn't it look cozy? It's calling to me as we speak. I'm going to join it.

This is how I feel

Like this... plus exhausted.

My furniture is so comfortable

What a cutie.

This is what it takes to "cuddle" on the couch.

Practice

So I decided to take a photo ramble through campus, since R is gone for the weekend and I'm trying to just take a day to relax. I've been learning some photography theory and wanted to explore the capabilities of my (actually, R's) camera - exposure, aperture, shutter speed, etc. I got rather discouraged when I was out there, feeling like I couldn't capture what I wanted to, but some of the pictures look okay. At least, there are elements about some of them that I've never been able to quite master before. Not that they're mastered now, by any means.

View of foggy fields on my way to work every day

Blogging re-initiated now that I have no time

Yep, how many of you missed me? I had a decent summer, wasn't too packed. I worked. Now that I'm back at school, and my full schedule is looming, I shall re-familiarize you all with my life as it is. Since I have so much free time now.

How about a class list:

1) Biochemistry 303 (looks hard - runs all year. Lots of memorizing chemical structures. Ugh.)
2) Biology 300 - Biometrics (like a stats class. Shouldn't be too bad, there's a computer-lab component as well)
3) Biology 331 - Developmental Biology (looks hard as well - 4 credit class instead of the usual 3. Also a lab component)
4) Biology 334 - Intro to Genetic Analysis (fun!!! I LOVE this class so far. It's all puzzles and tracing genetic diseases - not much memorizing either, just applying problem-solving skills)
5) Biology 361 - Cell physiology (my prof talks super fast, but this class shouldn't be too bad)
6) Biology 360 - Cell physiology lab, runs all year, with no associated lecture. Stands on its own. Looks fun.

I'm also co-leading a Core group (like a Bible study, associated with University Christian Ministries on campus), and attending weekly meetings, and possibly serving in a musical/worship area, though that is my last priority and they are aware of that.

AND! I'm getting a JOB!! Good thing, because I'm running out of money. I was also hoping to go on this retreat next weekend with UCM, but it's an extra $55 I don't have... amazing how my budget constricts. Once my scholarship's in maybe I won't feel so tight.

And now I don't feel so tight because I know this job is on the way!! I have been waiting for about a month and a half since the first interview - it's a typist job in Surrey for the RCMP, so I have to have security clearance. I had to do a security interview, and I knew it would be a long process... but I almost gave up hope. I think everyone that I told about this potential job thinks it fell through because it's been so long. But I heard from her today, and she's finally got the clearance, meaning we can start on the next step! Like working!! It'll suck to be going back to Surrey so often, but I am just an auxiliary (not the full-timer) so I am not the only person they rely on... it sounds like we can adjust pretty well for time. Like Saturdays and maybe one or two evenings/week. And it's union pay, so it's worth the travel time even for one shift.

Leaving my job this summer was kind of sad - I got to know my co-workers so much better this year. Felt like part of the team, and I was way more useful this year as well. Helps to not have to train from the beginning. I was indespensable! Felt good.

And on my last day, my boss brought in a big bouquet of flowers for me and they all signed a card hoping I'll be back next summer (they're sucking up because they got all these phone calls for references for this during-the-school-year job). AND the ladies all got together (3 of them in my department, 2 in reception) and bought me Timmy Ho's gift certificates!! They know how I love my morning coffees and they know I feel tight for money and they handed me a stack of ten booklets! That's $50 to Tim Hortons. Since we have 2 on campus I can afford to buy one coffee/week (say... Mondays?) and do that both semesters without losing a penny. I'm so thankful for the blessing of that job and those nice ladies.

And R and I are still together (he's on the first floor of my building this year, and I'm on the third).

I really miss my little sister.

I love the weather here - it's been hot but today was the first foggy day. I forgot how much I love the wind and fog on the point - stirs the romantic in me.

So tell me something. What do you want to hear about this year? I see all these themes in other peoples' blogs - Foto Fridays, Hair Thursdays, etc. For all you (3) faithful readers, maybe I'd find a funny comment to share each day I post. Or post a picture to epitomize my life that day. Any thoughts?

I'm not very good with random

1. I was homeschooled for a total of 4.5 years, interspersed with three different elementary schools, a middle school, and a high school.

2. I have 3 adopted siblings, 2 of which we still get in touch with occasionally. My parents were young and the 3 kids (all siblings with each other) had fetal alcohol syndrome. It was a challenge.

3. I taught myself to read before kindergarten and I spent the next 10 years with my face glued in books... a common answer to the question "where's Tricia?" was "reading on the can."

4. Despite being a science student, I get incredibly fixated (OCD anyone?) on spelling mistakes. Just ask me about the most common ones (tomorrow... it only has one "m"). I will rant.

5. One time I dyed two front pieces of my hair blonde. Then I decided to streak my hair blue (semi-permanently) but it just looked black, with green pieces in front. I tried to re-bleach them to lose the green and they turned orange... so I had orange/black/green hair. That was the end of my hair-dyeing attempts.

6. My first celebrity crush was on Phil, from the Newsboys. There was one line he sang that I would play over and over again on the music video machine at the Christian bookstore. I think I had a thing for his long hair.

7. I can't wait to have a baby. All I read about these days is poop and vomiting and tired and busy and terrible two's - but none of that can stop me. This machine is built for baby-making!! I turned 19 and maternal instinct just kicked in - never really thought of myself as a baby-person before that... I was all about a career. This doesn't mean I don't want a career, but now every time I see a baby R tries to cover my eyes so I don't ask him for one.

So! I don't know if I know 7 bloggers that haven't already done this... so I'm tagging Steph, Christine, Laura (though I understand if she doesn't do it, cuz she's in Africa), Sarah J (who I also haven't heard anything from in forever), Kim, and Heather.

Here are the rules… Each person tagged gives 7 random facts about themselves. Those tagged need to write in their blogs the 7 facts, as well as the rules of the game. You need to tag seven others and list their names on your blog. You have to leave those you plan on tagging a note in their comments so they know that they have been tagged and to read your blog.

Yay!

My last grade finally came in. I am becoming more and more pleased with my grades. My first semester at UBC was a shocker - I had a better-than-4.0 at TWU, but I quickly learned that TWU didn't have quite the academic standards that UBC has. My first term at UBC kinda flattened my faith in my academic level, but as I'm getting more and more used to the huge classes - and the need to network, immediately - they're slowly raising. I got straight A's this term, if you count A minuses:

Physical Chemistry: 84% (A-)
Intro to Biochemistry: 80% (A-)
Invertebrate Zoology: 81% (A-)
Organic Chemistry Lab: 89% (A)
Diatonic Harmony: 89% (A) I think I need to switch majors... music here I come!

So I've never been happy with 80 percents, but I'm realizing that 80%'s are GREAT!! Especially if they're relatively consistent. I'm learning not to be deathly dependent on good grades - other things are more important. I'm more excited to take more 3rd-year classes, cuz they'll be more specialized and interesting. Harder, but not so boring.

So I went back to my old job

What's different:

1. I got a raise! ($1.50!!)
2. I have a new desk neighbour who's much friendlier and more talkative than my last one.
3. I have no stapler. Very sad.
4. I have no phone (good and bad... good because less responsibility, but I think my supervisor's getting one for me soon)
5. There's construction everywhere, and our street is now a one-way, full of pylons and dirt and gravel. I have to take 2 detours to get to work and I have to double-park in our shrinking parking lot. We have to have vehicle ID tags in case someone who's boxed in has to leave.
6. I have a corkboard now instead of shelves (good for all the papers on my desk, bad for where I can put my binders of product info)
7. We have new warehouse locations, new procedures, new prices, new products - many things to learn.
8. I have a cool little "office organizer" - you know, the black wire mesh things - for my pen (singular) and pencil (again singular) and paper clips and white-out and sticky notes. There are too many empty compartments. I have to find some more office supplies just to fill out the organizer a little bit.
9. A new fax machine!! The 6 works the first time I press it!! Every time!!
10. I'm trying to drink more water at my desk.
11. A new monitor! Flat screen, no more big clunky old one.
12. My computer is slower than I remember. They sure spared no expense. My order entry skills seem tainted because I have to wait for the computer to catch up with ME.

What's the same:

1. It's still freezing. A/C is my friend, but I think they overdo it a little bit. Walking out the door requires shedding 3 layers of sweaters.
2. It's still boring.
3. Shipping details are still what mess me up the most.
4. We still have weekly meetings.
5. Morning coffee is still free!
6. Order entry is still boring.
7. I'm at the same desk in the same corner by the IT door so the poor guy has to go around my chair anytime he goes in the IT room.
8. I still dressed up nicely for the first day, and came the second day as per usual, without makeup.
9. Everyone else is still super nice, though a few new people have come and a few old people are gone.
10. Did I mention it's still boring?
11. My feet are cold.
12. McDonald's is still nearby... so I'm still always tempted... packing a lunch is still boring and there's still no food at my house with which to do it. I've held out so far.

Tech-y

I'm so proud of myself! I bought a router today and set up a wireless network in my house. Security-enabled it and everything, with a network key. This way I have a computer with internet in my room (my own) and I don't have to fight with my sister for her internet. Sweet deal.

"My Personality Album"

In moving home, I am doing some sorting. I found a little booklet that I filled out when I was thirteen. I found it funny to read what I wrote and see how small I dreamed. It was called "My Personality Album." Spelling/grammar is retained.

Me

• The nickname that best describes me is snigelfritz.
• Three words that describe my personality are easily angered, organized and artsy, talkative (I'm not good at keeping to three words, am I?)
• My most appealing physical feature is my eyes.
• What makes me an interesting person is you can never be sure of what I'm going to do, and I have lots of useful (or useless) facts.
• Three things that drive me nuts are pimples, being embarrassed, and bad-hair-days. (I think I only got about 1 zit per year, and yet I complained?)

Friends

• The qualities I value most in my friendships are fairness, the ability to have fun, and that they accept me.
• The times I most need a friend are when I'm embarrassed, sad, or just plain lonely.
• What my friends and I enjoy doing together most is talking and listening to music, or art. (listening to art? wow, grammar is good)

My family

• How I feel about my parents: Sometimes they have too many rules and expect too much of me, but I love them.
• Two famous people I'd pick for parents are my mom and dad's names (I didn't exactly go outside of the box there)
• My siblings' best qualities are: my brother is kind and helpful, and my sister is kind and sensitive.
• They drive me crazy when they tease me or leave my room messy.

Party time

• My idea of a great party is going to play laser tag or going horse-back-riding.
• The guy I'd like most to be my date is Darnell
• Famous guests I'd like to invite: Jaci Velasquez, DC Talk, Newsboys, Carl Brenders
• What I'd serve: Pop, pizza, nachos, cheezies, mini carrots, oreo ice-cream cake.
• My favourite rock group is DC Talk
• The three songs that mean the most to me are Wanna be in the Light, Time is..., Jesus Freak
• My favourite female singer is Jaci Velasquez
• My favourite male singer is Phil (Newsboys)
• My favourite album is Jesus Freak
• My favourite single cut is Wanna be in the Light
• I think the most talented musician in the world is Jaci Velasquez because she is the best singer I've ever heard.

School Days

• The best part about going to school is all the people
• The worst part is The HOMEWORK!!!!!
• My favourite subject is Explorations (this is a shocker, considering it's a mix of socials/English and I'm definitely NOT an arts student now)

Free Time

• My favourite indoor activity is DRAWING to music.
• My favourite outdoor activity is street hockey.
• How I keep busy: Reading, drawing, homework, listening to music, chores, telephone, Nintendo
• My favourite thing to do during summer vacation is Swim in a lake with Dad, Bro, Sis, and Mom

Dreams and Wishes

• My secret wish is to become like Jaci Velasquez and be an artist and vet.
• Two things I would grab if my room caught fire are my wallet and my Bible. (ever practical with the wallet idea)
  
• How I'd make my first million: My first Maxi Single. (??)
• How I'd spend my first millioni: Debts, colleges, keep most, half to missions.
• These are the things I'd buy on a free-spending shopping spree: Art supplies, gift certificates, never-ending supply of gifts, cd's, discman, clothes
• The two best gifts anyone could give me would be love, opportunities
• The two worst gifts anyone could give me would be underwear, textbooks (now I WISH my textbooks could be given to me! What was I thinking?!)
• The things I would take to a desert island are survival books, matches, an axe
• A conversation I'd love to overhear would be about my gifts - ie. Art, drama, music, etc. (wow, I was sure humble?)
• The title of a book I'd like to write is The Story of My Life (boring book, boring title)
• The menu for the best meal I can imagine is Pizza, veggies, smokies, cheezies, 7-up, chips (hmm... best meal ever? Again, I sure dreamed big)

Let's get serious

• The best part of my life now is school and youth.
• the most difficult problem that faces me now is how to grow in my relationship with Christ.
• The part of me that nobody knows is that I sometimes wonder what sex is like (this was a terrible burden of a secret for a sheltered 13-year-old... I felt horrible just admitting that I wondered! Gotta love growing up in guilt and fear)
• This is what I expect to be doing in ten years: Be going through University, and going on Missions Trips (The university part is on track; two years from now I'll be graduating, hopefully)
• A recurring dream I have is Claire's dad keeps dying (he hasn't died yet, as far as I know)
• My earliest childhood memory is mom or dad trying on a dress on me and saying that it's too big.
• Two words that describe my love life are adoring and young. (??)
  
• The three most important words in the English language are love, life, and food. (hahahahahhahaa... yep it was still me way back then!)
• My favourite pick-me-up when I'm sad is music and hugs.

The end.

All of that talk about art and drawing reminded me how much I liked it way back when. And I also came across this drawing, that I drew when I was ten. Now as much as I don't want to toot my own horn, here, I don't think I could draw this kind of thing now. Obviously I copied from a picture, as I usually do, but don't get me wrong - I was not a tracer. I am a firm believer in not tracing.

So I was impressed with myself. Ten is young. Makes me wonder why I didn't pursue it. All because of my tiny school where you had to choose between art and music. Stinking choices.

"Love is an irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired." - Robert Frost

R and I celebrated our two-year datin'-iversary on April 12. To put a cap on a tough year, and start an amazing new one, we got to go out on a date together, alone. It was the last day of classes, so we had no tests or exams to monopolize our evening (remember Valentine's Day?). We went to the Cellar, a jazz club I've been wanting to go to for about two years. It was busy and noisy, but a good time.

I love this boy. He makes me feel special and he's my best friend. Not to mention a great kisser and a loyal companion.


I was giving him heck yesterday because of his haircut. Not because he got it cut, because I love it, and he's sexier than he's ever been - but because we haven't had a picture together in so long that I missed the whole era of his long hair. I get jealous easily, and sometimes I see these brand new couples and their kazillion pictures of them together, going on great adventures - and my picture reservoir from this year contains us studying, us studying, and ... us studying. Sometimes there's a beach shot or two, with no one in them.

So I loved his long hair since he got this new hairdresser that shaped it nicely. It was fun to play with, even if he was always in need of a haircut. And as of last weekend it's short, and usually full of wax. But definitely hot, particularly since the stubble of neglect is growing in more evenly and manly than when we first started dating. But I was panicking that I had no pictures to mark the era. Also I was giving him heck by implying that most boyfriends (at least new ones) want pictures with their girlfriends, to mark their territory or do some slight bragging.

I found the one, above, and also several from the actual day of our dating-iversary, since he brought me flowers! Of course, there are none of us together:





You can see the fascinating subject of my concentration, even on the most celebrated day.

So. Pictures of us - together - will come more often, now that it is summer. Even though he has another course... when that is done, we will be trigger-happy.

Waiting

I am waiting to hear back from a potential job. I have a knot in my stomach. Pray that I get it, as it's $5 more than my last job, per hour, and then I don't have to go crawling back to my previous employer and ask if my position is still open.

Please!

Top 10 Things I have learned about studying, in order of increasing importance

1. The only way a boyfriend can be a good study buddy is if I look like I'm about to have a nervous meltdown. If I look panicked enough, he'll leave me in silence. Otherwise, every 30 seconds is a question about his own work, or a "Hey, did you know..." tidbit from his studies or his Time magazine. Very much distracts me and breaks up any concentration I may have had.
   
2. Msn does not help me study, whether I'm talking to someone from my class or not. Facebook also does not help.
3. Blogs do not help me study.
   
4. Music must be off. My brain is no longer sharp enough to concentrate with music. Even classical is a stretch. Anything else I realize I'm just bellowing at the top of my lungs and meanwhile reading the same paragraph over and over.
5. My brain is much duller than it used to be. I can no longer study only the day before. My memory is not what it used to be.
   
6. Chemistry is not my friend. It may pose, but it's not my friend.
7. If you want to study in science, be prepared... Psychology is really Biology, Biology is really all chemistry, Chemistry is essentially physics and Physics is all Calculus.
8. Sometimes I just have to start. Dreading the beginning of a new subject doesn't get me anywhere. Also, learning a lesson about procrastination doesn't mean I will remember the lesson.
   
9. Watching stupid episodes of the O.C. do not help me study in the least.
10. Most importantly: when studying for 18 hours straight in the same chair, I will never again wear underwear with elastic around the bum. This causes much pain and a deep, deep elastic-rubbed crease. This is the most important lesson I can share with anyone.
    

Interview!

These five questions were asked of me by Angella. Read to the end to discover how the interview can come to you!

1. Assuming calories don't count, what is your favourite - a salty or sweettreat?

This is a tough question. I love the sweet treat occasionally, but it's hard to separate whether I like salty treats more just because of their nature or because I feel less guilty eating them. I do love a salty treat more often than a sweet one, but if I had to give one up for my whole life, I'd give up the salty ones simply because of the number of options.

I don't like pretzels, and I don't like many snacky foods, like popcorn or many potato chips. I like tostitos/corn chips, and cheesy doritos, and cheesies (but ONLY the hard and crunchy ones). With sweet treats, on the other hand, even though I don't like most candies or cheesecake, I can enjoy everything from ice cream to frozen yogurt to chocolate and sour candies!

2. If you could live anywhere in the world (other than where you are),where would it be?

I would live in a place like France, where I've heard that post-secondary education is funded by the country, or Italy because of the beautiful beaches. Australia also sounds sweet, but since the question is actually about living somewhere else, I'm pretty happy with Canada. I know this is exactly what the question said not to pick, but I have to choose my home country. I don't have to worry to the same extent about the water (usually) or food being contaminated, or personal safety. Health care may suck to us spoiled Canadians but at least it's covered. And what better Canadian place to live than beautiful BC? We have the highest marine diversity in the world; I couldn't move anywhere that has the big city that I love so close to the sunshine coast, with tons of amazing species just waiting for me to study them.

3. What do you do when nobody's looking?

I watch tv. If we are perfectly honest, I may have been known to pick my nose once or twice... childhood habit that never got kicked, I guess. But I know I'm not alone. Any fellow gold-diggers out there?

4. If you could be a celebrity for a day, who would you be?

Hmm... a celebrity. Preferably one that is not writing any exams right now. It's hard to think of someone I'd want to be for only one day. I can think of people I'd want to be with. Maybe Dave Matthews - make him play music for me all day and make sure to hook him up with all my talented friends.

Maybe I'd be "that celebrity guy" from the commercials, so that I can opt out of all his future contracts. Those commercials are retarded.

Or I'd be Hilary Duff, so I can hold a press conference and tell all the little children/teen girls to pay no attention to me from here on in, because I will inevitably follow the path laid out by Christina Aguilera and Britney Spears. It goes from "I'm a virgin" to "I'm just comfortable with my body" to "Look out, skank-hos! Here I come to be queen"

5. Coke or Pepsi, diet or all sugar?

Used to be a die-hard Coke fan, but I caved. Now it's pepsi, all sugar.


So! If you would like to join in on the interviewing party, follow these directions:
1. Leave me a comment saying, “Interview me.”
2. I will respond by emailing you five questions. I get to pick the questions.
3. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

Can't say anything worthwhile

I've been putting off writing until I could say something significant about Kim, but I can't get to that point. Her memorial is today, and I'm going to be singing with my brother and sister-in-law. What happened, briefly, is here. My parents have been "sharing memories" all the past few days I've been home, and I realize they're also struggling - but I just want some space. Sometimes you're not ready for the memory sharing. Today's going to be an emotional day and It feels like I've got this lead weight in my gut.

One of my favourite memories is documented here. My brother and I were playing at EA, a coffeeshop in Langley. My bro surprised Kim by forcing her to get up on stage and play some of her own stuff. Brave girl she is, she did it. She was always taking opportunities and meeting obstacles head on, with a big laugh.